0.00000000001 Cubic Meters/Kg/Seconds Squared on Your MotherF#$@#*n Head!

Do you understand the effect Isaac Newton's revolutionary ideas still have on you at this moment? Or, as the gravitational constant in the title suggests, do you understand the gravity of the situation? (Ugh..Christ that's so cliche).

If you were not aware, let me summarize two headlines from yesterday that were pushed under the figurative rug. Please refer to http://www.wn.com/.

• Pakistani troops open fired on two US helicopters for crossing the Afghan border into Pakistani Airspace. The soldiers were following orders from President Musharraf.



• Bolstering a new military partnership, a squadron of the Russian Navy set sail for Venezuela and Venezuelan President, Hugo Chavez, travelled to Russia to meet with Russian President Dmitry Medvedev, or perhaps more importantly, Prime Minister Valdimir Putin.

My Rorschach response says, "Gee golly, sure am glad we currently have such a diplomatic foreign policy. Looks like we're all gonna have a gay old time!" I'm going to make a radical statement and say at this moment, I am not proud to call myself an American. Oh come on, throw the tomatoes and cabbage. I can already hear em, "Why don't you move to Russia?" Well before you get the cross ready, let me elaborate. I am not proud of our current diplomatic strategies of use Depleted Uranium first and ask questions later. I am not proud of bible-thumping neo conservatives. I am not proud that we don't allow gay marriage. I am not proud of our hegemony. I am not proud that a woman's right to her own body is still being debated. I am not proud that the taxpayers now have to pay trillions of dollars to bail out Fannie Mae for abusing the very system that should have been regulating it, but due to the conservative slippery-slope phobia of socialism, it was able to run rampant for years until the conservatives had no choice, but to federalize. The irony, we have socialized more of the U.S. than Venezuela. Eat that you masturbating-to-the-thought-of-laissez-faire-capitalism conservative bastards.

My pride in the United States is a derivative of the idea of our country, not our actions. I will always lay claim to the U.S. (well never say never) and never (ha) be one of those travelers who is afraid to say they are American. I will always get pissed off when I see a bunch of Mexican high school kids in California fly the Mexican flag above an upside down American flag. I even think English should be the primary language, enough said. I think capitalism is actually a great system for driving innovation and higher quality of life, but aspects of socialism should not be burned at the stake. And I definitely think we need an entire overhaul of our foreign policy even if that means we (Americans) need to swallow our pride for a couple of decades.

For whatever reason - ignorance, fascism, or just bad luck - Bush's policies have not worked. Guess what people? MCCAIN HAS THE SAME GODDAMN POLICIES!!! If a + b = shit pile, and the sum of c and d = the sum of a and b, then c and d are going to produce the same shit pile! The idea of a McCain/Palin foreign policy is potentially more frightening than Monkey Bush and Darth Cheney. You know what though? Upon additional investigation, it appears McCain and Palin should be given more credit. I mean with a nickname like Maverick, a hair-trigger temper and hardline on Russia, what could possibly go wrong? Oh and Palin. Don't worry about Palin's foreign policy experience, which she sums up in an interview on ABC with Charlie Gibson:

Charlie Gibson, "What insight into Russian actions particularly in the last couple weeks does the proximity of the state give you?

Sarah Palin, "They're our next door neighbors and you can actually SEE Russia from land in Alaska."

Charlie Gibson, "But what insight does that give you into what they're doing in Georgia.

Sarah Palin, "I'm giving you that perspective of how small our world is."

......Oh My (Insert Chosen Mythological Character Here).....

Here is an absolutely hilarious and scathing review of Sarah Palin from none other than Matttt Damonnnn. Even though Hollywood actors are inherently self-righteous, he does make a couple valid points. **Disclaimer** The following should be viewed for entertainment purposes only.

How is it that Bush - ergo McCain - claim to be conservative, but carry out such a radical foreign policy? Well, according to http://www.conservapedia.com/, a conservative is one who adheres to principles of limited government, personal responsibility and moral values. Limited government, huh? [Iraq War, Patriot Act, Wall-Street bailouts (reciprocity due to their skewed ideas of limited government)]. Moral values, huh? [What the fuck would your Jesus do? You oh so often talk for him, but have you read his teachings? Think your Jesus would be all for preemptive wars? Think your Jesus would be for your torture techniques? (Whoops forgot. It's not torture it's just roughing up. Sorry Johnny Maverick. Evidently you weren't tortured in the Hanoi Hilton, rather just roughed up). Since "No other encyclopedic resource on the internet is free of corruption by liberal untruths," we can safely conclude that Bush - ergo McCain - is not conservative, at least in terms of foreign policy. Guess who has a conservative foreign policy? That's right, Barack Obama. Here is an interesting article discussing the pragmatic approach Obama has on foreign policy; the pragmatic, conservative foreign policy we desperately need at the moment.http://www.dmagazine.com/ME2/dirmod.asp?nm=Core+Pages&type=gen&mod=Core+Pages&tier=3&gid=B33A5C6E2CF04C9596A3EF81822D9F8E

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I fully understand that international relationships are comprised of unfathomable nonlinear dynamics. This, in conjunction with our evolutionary habits, creates a fertile ground for war. Armed conflict will undoubtedly be around until there is only a singular human left. However, before you are so anxious to send someone else to combat a situation for your ideologies, lets do a little exercise. Just for sake of perspective-driven thinking, pretend that the only way for you to be pro-war on anything, YOU YOURSELF have to risk your life for that cause. Meditate on this for a moment. Do you still agree with Iraq? Would you even want to be fighting Al Qaeda in Afghanistan.?

The irony is the majority of people in agreement with these causes are the ProLifeRightWingChristians.